Wondering what you think about getting back together with an ex-husband. I am dating mine after a 5-year divorce, and I realize I never really got over him. Yes, he cheated on me, among other things. I do feel like he has learned a lesson, but how well remains to be seen. Also, please note that I am possibly the queen of questionable decisions…


Tulani B. The heart wants what it wants. Fool me twice shame on me. You need to figure out if you actually live him or the idea of him. Do you want to with him or just with someone…anyone. People usually divorce for a reason…if not many. Figure it out before you recycle. That said, of course, there’s nothing that says you can’t remarry your ex. Just do it for the right reasons.

Monday M. I’ve heard of people marrying their exes a second time and more often than not it doesn’t work. But there’s that small percentage… Just be, and shape the future how you both feel is right. If it works, great. If it doesn’t, that’s fine too.

Dena G. It happens. Elizabeth Taylor married Richard Burton twice. But I’m not so convinced about the “lessons he learned”. What did you learn? And how can you not repeat the past?

My best guy friend is unhappy in his marriage…no shared interests, hasn’t had sex in years, he goes to bed at 10:30 and she goes to bed at 1:30, she is shaving her lady parts differently than he likes (last time he saw), she’s changing/undressing in the bathroom, he found a pair of panties he has never seen on her (he has a mild panty fetish), she is texting all the time, and she calls to see if he is on his way home on a regular basis within 10 minutes of his business closing (he works 45 minutes from home). I say she is having an affair and he says “no way”. Your thoughts?

– Anonymous

Dena G. No shit Sherlock. But your buddy chooses to believe differently. Let it be.

Need Advice?

Our team of wise, witty, and uber-experienced WWVWD moderators give their own special spin in answering your most intimate questions. To submit an anonymous question, please fill out this form:

Meet the Mods


Tulani B.

Profesional Manager, Mother, Negotiator… purveyor of sardonic optimism with a love for gifs and great conversation.


Dena G.

Over-the-top, wise-ass, soon-to-be retired school teacher who aspires to count beyond two breaths in her meditation practice.


Monday M.

Buddhist soul, jazz mind, empath heart and wine blood, this avid foodie and songstress can cook up tasty morsels of thought.
The Woolfer Newsletter Team
Stephanie Staal and Nina Collins have worked together and adored each other since 1994 when they were both babies in the world of book publishing. Stephanie is a lawyer, journalist, & author of READING WOMEN, and Nina is the founder of "What Would Virginia Woolf Do?" Hillary Richard is also a lawyer and co-host of the Raging Gracefully podcast. Sidney Morss is a recent NYU grad and the youngest member of our team.